best Christmas

I have not been posting.  The basement apartment was haunted by a ghost.  I rented a bed in a basement from a woman who’s husband died.  She put shelves in the middle of the room to bisect, and put a bed there.  It was affordable with me SSDI benefits.  I posted in October about the bad air and no light.  There was also a ghost.  I didn’t sleep while I was there.  I did as much pet sitting as asked so I can sleep somewhere else.  I told my friend who told me about the room that a ghost was keeping me up.


I guess I had no other options at that time .    My friend knew about the ghost and another ghost in the same building, which is not a basement room, but I guess she knew how I needed a low rent room and the mental health system put me in a dangerous unhealthy situation so she was helping me. I stayed there from 9/28/15 to 11/19/15 and now I am a day away from the city I was born and lived four and a half decades in and never left.

I have been here for a month.  I have been resting.  After two weeks of being here i became very sick, head and body pain all over, could not get up, could not eat, only woke up to drink water and trying to go back to sleep through the pain, vomiting and diarrhea.  I made the mistake of not changing my resident address so I cannot go to a doctor with medicaid and medicare except for emergencies.  I stuck it out for a week without medicine or pain killers and I am better now.

Nothing special for Christmas but I am with a friend that cares about my health.  He does not tell me that I should get a supermarket job and pay market rent, as many have told me.  He does not doubt my mental health problems.  He knows that I need to sleep off not sleeping in the ghost basement and  the sleep deprivation from inhaling crystal meth and then the rashes that took two months to subside, when I lived in supportive housing  in late 2014 and early 2015.

I started to get rashes about 5 days ago.  It does not hurt like the crystal meth rashes.  I looked online and saw that all over rashes are a symptom of detoxing.  I also take it as a sign to not go back to nude and fetish modeling.  I, out of being self sufficient and working since I was 15 years old, and being against laziness.  When I looked on Craigslist, the only jobs that I can apply for were for fetish modeling and soft porn.  I don’t have a car, nor learned to drive, so most jobs available in this rural place requires transportation.  I keep needing to stop thinking that I should work no matter what.






Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s